8/20/09
Lying (laying?) low
If you are here because you can't find me on FB - I am "deactivated" for awhile. It's time for a little more substance, a little more quiet. This week has been so...intense for my family and for me personally. Pulling back is not a bad thing, at least in this instance - just a little rebuilding phase.
8/13/09
Chchchchanges
I haven't blogged for a very, very, very long time. I stopped when I got too busy with moving from the old apartment to the new...then Christmas came...then I just...stopped.
But I have missed the blog. Sometime later I will attempt a list of some of the things that have happened since last fall/winter. For now, I'm thinking about change.
As I type this, I'm waiting for a great-nephew to arrive. To be more precise, my whole family is waiting for this baby to arrive - and he is taking his time. In this case, joy has temporarily changed into a bit of anxiety and impatience - soon to be replaced by greater joy, I'm sure. Nicholas will be the first baby in our family for 25 years (exactly, as my niece turned 25 today), and he will change all of our lives.
As I scanned through my personal photos to post one on the blog (part of my effort to stop using copyrighted images!), I came across one of Bennie, the little Westie dog that belongs to a friend of mine. That friend will be moving soon - sooner than I'll be ready for, I'm sure - and then I will no longer see the friend nor Bennie. I've moved a lot over the years and know that distance does change friendships, especially as time effects its own distancing. These are changes I wish never had to happen.
I had a fantastic summer vacation - the best in probably 12-13 years. Part of my enjoyment consisted of not having to worry about a job, a dissertation, a move, a car purchase, imminent poverty, etc. My life truly has changed; that in turn allowed me to be fully present this summer with my friends and sisters. I'm trying hard to carry this feeling with me every day - to look people in the eye calmly and attentively rather than to be preoccupied with my own fears and tears. I like this change.
More to come...bedtime for this Bonzo right now.
But I have missed the blog. Sometime later I will attempt a list of some of the things that have happened since last fall/winter. For now, I'm thinking about change.
As I type this, I'm waiting for a great-nephew to arrive. To be more precise, my whole family is waiting for this baby to arrive - and he is taking his time. In this case, joy has temporarily changed into a bit of anxiety and impatience - soon to be replaced by greater joy, I'm sure. Nicholas will be the first baby in our family for 25 years (exactly, as my niece turned 25 today), and he will change all of our lives.
As I scanned through my personal photos to post one on the blog (part of my effort to stop using copyrighted images!), I came across one of Bennie, the little Westie dog that belongs to a friend of mine. That friend will be moving soon - sooner than I'll be ready for, I'm sure - and then I will no longer see the friend nor Bennie. I've moved a lot over the years and know that distance does change friendships, especially as time effects its own distancing. These are changes I wish never had to happen.
I had a fantastic summer vacation - the best in probably 12-13 years. Part of my enjoyment consisted of not having to worry about a job, a dissertation, a move, a car purchase, imminent poverty, etc. My life truly has changed; that in turn allowed me to be fully present this summer with my friends and sisters. I'm trying hard to carry this feeling with me every day - to look people in the eye calmly and attentively rather than to be preoccupied with my own fears and tears. I like this change.
More to come...bedtime for this Bonzo right now.
8/10/09
World keeps on turning...
Today I visited seattlepi.com for the first time - the online source for what is left of the Seattle Post-Intelligencer. There I clicked on a story about the old Denny's site in Ballard. The graphic that appeared on my screen made me gasp out loud (honestly!). It was a rendering of the 8-story multi-use building that will go up on the site. Although it still startles me to read descriptions like "tower element" describing any building in Ballard, what really shocked me in the graphic was that the new building was surrounded by other multi-story, multi-use buildings.
Though I realized long ago that the old Ballard I knew (working class, heavily Norwegian, full of divey bars, crusty old fishermen, and pokey drivers) had vanished, the idea of a cosmopolitan Ballard still just...sits wrong.
And this is the 2nd time in two weeks I've had this reaction to a place I used to live. Last year I mentioned my old Oakland, CA neighborhood, Temescal. My memories include the bullet-proof plastic separating me from the counter help at Kentucky Fried Chicken (the chicken was passed through a lazy susan, for all the world like cash or gold bullion), the local Post Office workers hanging out at the bar before opening at 8 a.m., and the prostitute who solicited my ex-husband one Sunday night as we folded our towels at the laundromat.
Like Ballard, Temescal has apparently undergone a transformation. The website for the neighborhood shows children with painted faces at the annual street fair, lists several upscale restaurants, and generally makes the former site of the Pussycat Theater unrecognizable to me.
While the changes in Temescal are clearly an improvement, I wonder what has happened to all the poor people and old Italian families that filled that neighborhood. Likewise, Ballard is thriving - but has lost all its local color.
I guess I'm not exactly nostalgic - well, maybe for Ballard I am (especially the divey bars) - just pondering how much of my emotional life I left in those places. Maybe we feel most strongly about any place we lived when we were young; certainly, I'll never feel as affectionately toward Lincoln as I do toward Oakland, even if Lincoln is a much nicer place to live!
Though I realized long ago that the old Ballard I knew (working class, heavily Norwegian, full of divey bars, crusty old fishermen, and pokey drivers) had vanished, the idea of a cosmopolitan Ballard still just...sits wrong.
And this is the 2nd time in two weeks I've had this reaction to a place I used to live. Last year I mentioned my old Oakland, CA neighborhood, Temescal. My memories include the bullet-proof plastic separating me from the counter help at Kentucky Fried Chicken (the chicken was passed through a lazy susan, for all the world like cash or gold bullion), the local Post Office workers hanging out at the bar before opening at 8 a.m., and the prostitute who solicited my ex-husband one Sunday night as we folded our towels at the laundromat.
Like Ballard, Temescal has apparently undergone a transformation. The website for the neighborhood shows children with painted faces at the annual street fair, lists several upscale restaurants, and generally makes the former site of the Pussycat Theater unrecognizable to me.
While the changes in Temescal are clearly an improvement, I wonder what has happened to all the poor people and old Italian families that filled that neighborhood. Likewise, Ballard is thriving - but has lost all its local color.
I guess I'm not exactly nostalgic - well, maybe for Ballard I am (especially the divey bars) - just pondering how much of my emotional life I left in those places. Maybe we feel most strongly about any place we lived when we were young; certainly, I'll never feel as affectionately toward Lincoln as I do toward Oakland, even if Lincoln is a much nicer place to live!
3/1/09
Speaking of which...
I am piggybacking on my last blog post. I chose "Venusian" instead of "Martian" or "Plutonian" for two reasons:
1. It sounds pretty.
2. It reminds me of the old Venusian Temple in Seattle. This was back before the powers that be cleaned up 1st Avenue and it was still lined with strip clubs, dingy longshoremans' bars, and other shadowy caves - however, the power of reform/urban renewal was in the air. The Venusian Temple managed to get around the laws about nudity, prostitution, etc. by declaring itself a church and the ladies who worked there some sort of Venusian ministers, who were only performing their holy offices when they took of their clothes in front of strange men.
One of my favorite memories was of watching a local show called "Town Meeting," and having the moderator interview a scantily clad "minister."
My one TV appearance was on a "Town Meeting" episode about porn...but that's another entry.
1. It sounds pretty.
2. It reminds me of the old Venusian Temple in Seattle. This was back before the powers that be cleaned up 1st Avenue and it was still lined with strip clubs, dingy longshoremans' bars, and other shadowy caves - however, the power of reform/urban renewal was in the air. The Venusian Temple managed to get around the laws about nudity, prostitution, etc. by declaring itself a church and the ladies who worked there some sort of Venusian ministers, who were only performing their holy offices when they took of their clothes in front of strange men.
One of my favorite memories was of watching a local show called "Town Meeting," and having the moderator interview a scantily clad "minister."
My one TV appearance was on a "Town Meeting" episode about porn...but that's another entry.
Across the Universe
After my big announcement about being "back" last week, I haven't posted blasted thing. I guess I've been waiting until I could post photos, be witty, etc. That wait could be very, very long.
Instead, I've been using my limited "spare" time (and some of my not-so-spare time) indulging in Turner Classic Movies' "31 Days of Oscar." This is the first year in about five that I've had cable. Never mind that I've seen most of the movies before; I'm still capable of being late to work due to watching something like The Bridge on the River Kwai for the 12th time at 6 a.m. on a Wednesday.
Tonight I went to the TCM website and thought I'd "join" - whatever that might entail. For once, I decided to actually read the "terms of use" before clicking OK. And here's what I found: a statement noting that all emails, correspondence, etc. become "property of TCM throughout the universe."
Throughout theuniverse.
Perhaps this is a "universal" statement in the online world (so to speak); perhaps it's just Ted Turner's way of thinking. But it gave me pause enough that I did not complete my enrollment. I'm not sure I want some Venusian reading my emails.
Instead, I've been using my limited "spare" time (and some of my not-so-spare time) indulging in Turner Classic Movies' "31 Days of Oscar." This is the first year in about five that I've had cable. Never mind that I've seen most of the movies before; I'm still capable of being late to work due to watching something like The Bridge on the River Kwai for the 12th time at 6 a.m. on a Wednesday.
Tonight I went to the TCM website and thought I'd "join" - whatever that might entail. For once, I decided to actually read the "terms of use" before clicking OK. And here's what I found: a statement noting that all emails, correspondence, etc. become "property of TCM throughout the universe."
Throughout theuniverse.
Perhaps this is a "universal" statement in the online world (so to speak); perhaps it's just Ted Turner's way of thinking. But it gave me pause enough that I did not complete my enrollment. I'm not sure I want some Venusian reading my emails.
2/22/09
At the Laundromat
For a good chunk of my growing up years, my family didn't have a washing machine. This meant trips to the laundromat (oh, the stories I could tell!). I had to pass the time somehow; here's a poem I turned out one Sunday. I can date it, because it was accepted for publication in our 6th grade literary journal, "PeeWee Panthers" (despite the vague noun "deal" as its last word, something I would now chastise a student for doing!).
At the Laundromat
I once went to the laundromat,
and there I almost had a cat
because we only sat, and sat.
We got there - well, say rather late,
the coin machine wouldn't operate.
Would my poor sock have a mate?
This poem is really real
And to you it should reveal
The laundromat is a trying deal!
At the Laundromat
I once went to the laundromat,
and there I almost had a cat
because we only sat, and sat.
We got there - well, say rather late,
the coin machine wouldn't operate.
Would my poor sock have a mate?
This poem is really real
And to you it should reveal
The laundromat is a trying deal!
2/21/09
Yawwnn...
My blog hibernation is, I believe, finally coming to an end. Moving unsettled lots of things, and then the Facebook succubus interfered. But I have missed Fayaway's Notebook the whole time. Actually Vince inspired me - in a stunning act of techno-nostalgia, he's ditching his cell phone for a landline. Thus, I think I will ditch FB for awhile in favor of the Notebook! Of course, it's convenient that I've been lavishly spreading the word that I plan to give up FB for Lent, and Ash Wednesday is only a few days away...
In any event, I am back. The sock photo actually has a point, which I will make in my next blog.
The other thing that inspired me: Judy spent the whole day today writing a poem in some sort of literary marathon. The prompt she was given: "Why is it always red?" We had several conversations about her writing throughout the day. Then, in a completely disconnected event, I finally made it to Target to buy tissues. Why Target? Because they sell store-brand tissues in solid red boxes. Why is it always red, indeed!
In any event, I am back. The sock photo actually has a point, which I will make in my next blog.
The other thing that inspired me: Judy spent the whole day today writing a poem in some sort of literary marathon. The prompt she was given: "Why is it always red?" We had several conversations about her writing throughout the day. Then, in a completely disconnected event, I finally made it to Target to buy tissues. Why Target? Because they sell store-brand tissues in solid red boxes. Why is it always red, indeed!
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